My mothering journey is still ever unfolding. It is magical & powerful to know that my body, this vessel created the bones, brains and veins and incubates life. Becoming a mom absolutely changed me for the better. I must say I didn’t realize just how much everything in my life would drastically change until she got here. I found out I was 5 months pregnant with zero symptoms...I listened to my intuition/body on what to eat, my body's physical limits and just nurtured myself and baby. Pregnancy was perfect, to me no stretch marks means perfect lol. I Loved feeling her grow, kick and flip around in my womb; Upon her arrival I slept through my contractions and the Doctor had to wake me up at 10 centimeters. It was a natural birth with no medicine of any kind. Baby girl came out vibrantly healthy.
I feel like I am the best mother for my child because I know just what to do and how to read my baby’s verbal and non-verbal cues. I simply listen to her. She tells me everything to do. Watching her body language and learning her non-verbal cues, she tells me where to touch, rub and kiss. I love waking up to my baby every morning, hearing her try to talk and reply back to me.
Also, doing my baby’s laundry is literally the best chore. I genuinely love it; witnessing and being present in her growth and development. I love watching her blossom.
I have faith that I can be the best example for her by showing her instead of just telling her. I know that children pay attention to our actions more than our words.
The biggest surprise I’ve experienced since becoming a mom is that my body odor drastically changed and sweating profusely out. of. nowhere... I’m literally still in shock, I apply deodorant 2/3 times a day.
My relationship with her father feels like a roller coaster ride, we have good days and not so good days. We’re not married yet, but her father is very active in our life. I absolutely love that Daisy see's her grandparents daily, she arrived at the perfect time for them. They have their own special bond and language.
Struggling with postpartum mental illness has not been easy to say the least, I have in fact gone insane, and no one saw me or knew about it. The mental instability I experienced was on lower levels I didn't know existed. My hardest memory of motherhood was not being able to fully breastfeed my baby like I wanted to. Forgiving myself and feeling guilty has been a process. My postpartum depression played a huge factor, I was mentally not present with my child for the first four or five months of her life. Just existing moving like a robot. I can confidently say now I feel like I have definitely overcome the major hurdles and am striding into home stretch. Feeling more Balanced with Mental, Spiritual & Emotional Clarity and Wholeness. Feeling Free.
I am Overjoyed to be a working mama or “momprenuer”, thanks to COVID. I have always had the entrepreneurial spirit I just could find something that would stick, until baby Daisy came along. My work/life balance is better than ever. I get to stay home with the baby, I've always wanted to be a stay at home mom; I am on her schedule and be at her beck and call lol. I work on my business throughout the day until 4 am-ish. Sometimes she's up watching me or picking out our next pieces to launch.
Now I'm learning the new me, to nurture myself, to fill my cup so I can pour into my baby and our business. I'm still in shock that I'm a mother now. Grateful.
I have grown and will continue to grow as an individual in my motherhood journey. I am more Fearless. Resilient. I don’t take shit from anyone. Finding strength in the depths of my being I didn't know I had, it's very fascinating growing/ raising a baby and a business at the same time. I feel unstoppable.